Why Does My EX GIRLFRIEND Keep Calling Me?
So she broke up with you... but your phone still keeps on ringing. For some reason your ex girlfriend won't stop calling you up, but at the same time she's giving you mixed signals about exactly what she wants. So what gives?
In actuality, the situation is a lot more common than you might think. Between phone calls, emails, text-messages, Facebook, MySpace, and everything else keeping you connected to your ex girlfriend, it's very hard to sever all lines of communication at once. And if your ex is still trying to keep some of those lines open? Odds are she has very good (and specific) reasons for it.
So why does your ex girlfriend still call? What does she want from you, if anything at all?
Reasons Your Ex Will Keep Calling You After The Breakup
First and foremost, your exgirlfriend is probably looking for comfort. You were a big part of her life, and when the breakup occurred she probably underestimated how much she'd miss you. Losing a relationship can often leave a big void in your life where the other person used to be, and even if she's the one who initiated the breakup this can lead to her feeling uneasy or uncertain about her decision.
This doesn't necessarily mean your ex wants you back, but it's the beginning of that road. There are special methods and techniques you can use to help speed that process along, if you're looking to actually get back together with your ex girlfriend.
Another reason your ex will get back in touch with you is to keep tabs on what you're doing. In this case, your girlfriend rejected you as her boyfriend but isn't yet ready to let you go... not completely, anyway. In the meantime, she'll keep an eye on you. She'll watch to make sure you're not out having too much fun, seeing other people, or worst of all, moving on without her.
Types of Ex Girlfriend Contact
How your ex contacts you can say a lot about what she wants. The friendly "Hi, I just called to see how you're doing" phone call is really nothing more than a smokescreen. She's looking to gather information about your current social life, as well as feeling you out to see how you're doing without her. As a general rule, a girl who breaks up with you wants to see you down, lonely, depressed, and wanting her back. This justifies the past relationship. In her mind, you really did care about her and weren't just wasting her time.
Another variation of such a phone call is where your ex calls "just to make sure you're okay". This has very little to do with your own mental state and a lot more to do with hers. Your ex girlfriend is making this call because once again, she wants to see that you're miserable without her. It's not that she wishes misery upon you - it's more to make her feel good and boost her own ego in knowing she's missed by you at all.
Text-messages are also extremely common after a breakup. If your ex girlfriend is sending you texts, it's a more cowardly way of feeling you out. She's too scared to call, or she doesn't want to 'lead you on'. Of course, if you're still in love with her any contact your ex girlfriend makes is going to be leading you on, but that's besides the point.
Getting Your Ex Girlfriend Back - How To Handle Post-Breakup Contact
If you happen to be in the boat where you still want your ex back, the very fact that she's making such contact is a very good sign. An ex who truly and completely wants nothing more to do with you - romantically anyway - is going to walk in the opposite direction and not look back. In that case, you'll see very little if any communication from your ex girlfriend at all.
Most girls who contact ex boyfriends will first do so under the guise of being friends. The whole "let's stay friends after the breakup" thing is a big farce of course, as it's nearly impossible to carry on a platonic relationship after having such an intimate connection. In this case, your ex is using friendship as an excuse to keep you within easy reach. She gets to see you, talk to you, and know exactly what you're doing at all times... but since you agreed to be her friend you're not allowed to make any romantic moves in her direction. This is the FRIEND ZONE, and you need to avoid it at all costs!
So why does your ex girlfriend keep calling you? Because she's looking for information, validation, and possibly to keep the door to your past relationship open just a crack. If you want back in, you need to know exactly how to handle such contact in a way that will make your ex want and miss you again.
Getting a girlfriend back is a lot like anything else in life: the more you know, the better your chances of success. Learning proper withdrawal techniques is just as important as knowing what to say to your ex girlfriend, as well as exactly when to say it.
There are 8 Individual Steps necessary to Winning Your Girlfriend Back, so find out what they are! Learn exactly what your opening moves should be, as well as which additional signs show that your ex girlfriend is still in love with you.
Discuss this Article
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